Parenting Time and Family Mediation in Ontario:  What You Need to Know

Parenting Time and Family Mediation in Ontario: 

What You Need to Know

Divorce is never easy, and when children are involved, things can get even more complicated. One of the most critical decisions you'll face as a divorcing parent is determining parenting time—how you and your ex-spouse will share time with your children. While every family's situation is unique, there are various parenting time arrangements to consider, and family mediation can help guide you toward a solution that works for everyone.

In this article, we’ll break down the key aspects of parenting time in Ontario, explore different parenting time schedules based on the AFCC’s recommendations, and explain how family mediation can help resolve parenting time disputes. Whether you're discussing a 50/50 shared parenting schedule, a week-on, week-off arrangement, or something more customized, this guide will help you understand your options.

What is Parenting Time in Ontario?

Simply put, parenting time refers to the time a child spends with each parent after separation or divorce. It’s about more than just dividing days; it’s about ensuring your child’s needs are met in a balanced and consistent manner. In Ontario, parenting time is typically structured in a way that supports the child’s best interests—both physically and emotionally.

Ontario's Family Law Act puts a strong emphasis on the best interests of the child, which includes factors like the child’s emotional needs, developmental stage, and the ability of each parent to provide a stable and nurturing environment. There is no one-size-fits-all solution, and that’s where family mediation comes into play.

Suggested Parenting Time Arrangements in Ontario Based on the AFCC

The AFCC (Association of Family and Conciliation Courts) offers guidelines that suggest various parenting time schedules based on the child’s age and developmental needs. But remember, the best arrangement is the one that suits your family’s dynamic and the child’s needs. There is no one size fits all approach. 

Important Caveat…

It's important to note that these parenting time arrangements are most effective for families where both parents can cooperate and communicate well. They are not suitable for every family, particularly those where there are issues such as abuse and/or domestic violence. In such cases, alternative arrangements, such as supervised parenting time or other legal interventions, may be necessary to ensure the safety and well-being of everyone involved.

Here are a few options:

1. The 2-2-3 Schedule

This schedule is ideal for families looking for an equal division of parenting time. It’s popular for younger children who need frequent contact with both parents.

• How it works: The child spends two days with one parent, then two days with the other, followed by three days  (the weekend) back with the first parent. The cycle flips each week, so both parents get alternating weekends.

• What it looks like: Parent A has the child on Monday and Tuesday, Parent B has the child on Wednesday and Thursday, and then Parent A has the child again on Friday to Sunday. The following week, Parent B has the child on Monday and Tuesday, Parent A has the child on Wednesday and Thursday, and so on...

• Why it’s beneficial: This schedule gives both parents the opportunity to stay actively involved in the child's daily life. It also provides children with a predictable routine and ensures they spend meaningful time with both parents.  It also means the child never goes more than three days without seeing one parent, which can be reassuring for younger children.

• Potential downsides: The frequency of transitions between homes, which could feel a bit disruptive for some families.

2. The 2-2-5-5 Schedule

Similar to the 2-2-3 schedule, this arrangement offers a little more flexibility, giving both parents longer, more meaningful stretches of time with their child.

• How it works: The child spends two days with one parent, followed by two days with the other parent. Then, they spend the next five days with the first parent. The cycle repeats every two weeks.

• What it looks like: Parent A has the child every Monday and Tuesday. Parent B has the child every Wednesday and Thursday.
  The weekends rotate:

• One week, Parent A has the child from Friday after school through Wednesday morning (typically dropping off at school).

• The next week, Parent B has the child from Wednesday after school through Monday morning (typically dropping off at school).

In other words, after the regular midweek visits, each parent takes turns enjoying a long weekend — plus a few bonus days — with their child.

• Why it’s beneficial: This schedule offers a balanced approach by ensuring both parents enjoy extended, uninterrupted time with their child. It also brings a sense of predictability — each parent knows they’ll have the same weekdays every week. The longer five-day stretches help strengthen the parent-child bond and create a stable, comforting routine.

• Potential downsides: The child is away from one parent for up to five consecutive days, which can feel like a long time — especially for younger kids or those who do better with frequent contact. Some children might experience feelings of missing the parent they're not with during these longer gaps.

3. The 4-3-3-4 (or 3-4-4-3) Schedule

This option is not talked about as often, but it can be a great balance between frequent transitions and longer stretches of parenting time.

• How it works: The child spends 4 days with one parent, then 3 days with the other. The next week, the schedule flips—3 days with the first parent and 4 days with the second. This alternating pattern continues week to week, with just one day shifting each time, depending on what the parents agree on.

• What it looks like: Parent A has the child from Monday to Thursday, and Parent B from Friday to Sunday.

• The following week, Parent A has the child from Monday to Wednesday, and Parent B takes over from Thursday to Sunday—and so on.

• Why it’s beneficial:  This schedule hits a sweet spot between flexibility and structure. Compared to a 2-2-3, it gives your child more time to settle in with each parent—without going a full 5-day stretch like in a 2-2-5-5. That means fewer transitions for your child, and a more predictable rhythm for both parents.

• Potential downsides: This schedule might need a little extra teamwork between the parents to coordinate appointments and activities.

4. Week On, Week Off

This arrangement is often used when both parents live relatively close to one another and have equal parenting abilities. It works best for older children who are able to handle more extended time with each parent.

• How it works: The child spends a full week with one parent, then switches to the other parent the following week. This cycle continues, with both parents taking turns.

• What it looks like: Parent A has the child from Monday to Sunday in one week, and then Parent B has the child from Monday to Sunday the next week.

• Why it’s beneficial: A week-on, week-off schedule provides a consistent and fair division of time. Children benefit from having one parent to focus on each week and can build deeper relationships with both. 

• Potential downsides: It can be tough for younger children who may need more frequent transitions.

5. Nesting

In this unique arrangement, the child stays in the family home while the parents take turns living in the home with the child on a rotating schedule. This allows the child to maintain stability in their environment, with each parent having access to their child while respecting the family’s former living space.

• How it works: One parent stays in the family home with the child while the other parent lives elsewhere. The parents alternate living in the home, often on a weekly basis, or under any arrangement that they agree on. 

• What it looks like: Parent A stays one week in the family home with the child and leaves when the other parent arrives and so on.

Why it’s beneficial: 

• Nesting allows the child to stay in a familiar environment, providing emotional stability during a tumultuous time. It can also make the transition easier for children who struggle with constant change.

• Ideal for families with younger children or those who want to minimize disruption to the child’s living space. However, it requires a high level of cooperation between parents and a flexible approach.

Potential downsides: 

• Expense: The arrangement can be costly, as both parents need to maintain separate living spaces—one for when they are not staying in the family home.

• Inconvenience: Constantly switching between two households can be logistically challenging for both parents, as they must coordinate living spaces and other responsibilities. It can also be physically and emotionally taxing to “move out” of the family home on a regular basis.

6. One Overnight and Every Other Weekend 

This arrangement is a common choice for families where one parent has a more substantial role in day-to-day care, while still ensuring the child maintains a solid relationship with both parents.

• How it works: One parent has the child for the majority of the time, while the other parent spends a smaller but significant amount of time. This often includes one overnight stay with the second parent during the week (often a Wednesday night), plus time every other weekend.

  

• What it looks like: For example, during week 1, Parent A would care for the child primarily, and Parent B would have one overnight mid-week. Parent B could pick the child up from school on Wednesday, have them overnight, and then drop them off at school on Thursday. During week 2, Parent B would have the child for the entire weekend, from Friday after school until Sunday evening or drop off at school on Monday morning.

Why it’s beneficial: 

• Stability and Bonding: The child primarily resides with one parent, providing a stable home environment, while still maintaining strong connections with the other parent through the mid-week and weekend time. This offers an opportunity for Parent B to connect with the child during the week, helping with schoolwork or simply spending time together. The weekend time reinforces this relationship, contributing to deeper bonding.

• Routine and Predictability: The child benefits from a consistent weekly routine, spending most of their time in one home, which can help them feel secure and grounded. The alternating visits ensure they see both parents regularly, but without the back-and-forth stresses of more frequent transitions.

• School Stability: Since the child is primarily in one home, their school and extracurricular activities remain uninterrupted, avoiding the disruption that comes from frequent transitions. 

These schedules can offer a more flexible parenting arrangement, especially when parents have different work schedules. It can also be ideal when one parent has more flexibility or resources to accommodate the child.

7. Long Distance Parenting (When One Parent Lives Abroad)

In situations where one parent lives abroad, a summer/holiday-only arrangement may be the best option. During the school year, the child typically resides with the primary caregiver, but during the summer months, the other parent—who may live in a different country, province, city, or town—can have extended parenting time, allowing for more significant time together.

• How it works: One parent may have the child for extended periods during the summer months, often with extended vacation time or visits. This is especially common in cases where the other parent lives overseas or in another province.

• Why it’s beneficial: This arrangement allows children to maintain connections with both parents, even if they can’t be together during the school year. It’s a practical solution for parents who may be far apart geographically but still want to stay involved in their child's life.

• Ideal for families with one parent living abroad or far from the child’s primary residence.

The AFCC’s Role in Parenting Time Arrangements

The AFCC (Association of Family and Conciliation Courts) plays a key role in shaping family law and best practices for parenting time arrangements. The AFCC provides guidelines and resources for families going through separation and divorce, advocating for a child-centered approach to decision-making.

Their guidelines help professionals (like family mediators, parenting assessors/professionals, and lawyers) navigate complex cases with a focus on the best interests of the child. They offer expert advice on establishing appropriate parenting time arrangements based on the child's developmental stage and needs, ensuring that each family is supported in finding the most suitable solution.

How Family Mediation Works for Parenting Time Disputes in Ontario

When parenting time disputes arise, family mediation provides a calm and collaborative approach to resolving disagreements, avoiding the stress and time of a drawn-out court battle. In Ontario, mediation supports parents in addressing parenting-related issues while always prioritizing the child's best interests.

• What issues can be resolved through mediation? Family mediation creates a structured and supportive environment where a wide range of issues can be addressed. These include parenting time schedules, decision-making responsibilities, holiday arrangements, and even financial matters related to child support. Mediation provides an opportunity to develop a comprehensive parenting plan that covers every aspect of a child's daily life, ensuring that all details are carefully discussed, fully understood, and mutually agreed upon. This process helps ensure that each concern is thoughtfully considered, resulting in a well-rounded, sustainable agreement that both parents can follow.

• Is family mediation mandatory before going to court for parenting time? In Ontario, family mediation is not mandatory, but it is strongly encouraged. Courts often recommend mediation as the first step before resorting to litigation. This approach can lead to faster, more amicable resolutions, and avoids the adversarial nature of a court battle.

• What are the qualifications of Family Mediators in Ontario? Family mediators in Ontario are often accredited by professional organizations like the Ontario Association for Family Mediation (OAFM). These mediators are trained experts in conflict resolution, child development, and family dynamics, providing families with the support and guidance needed to navigate complex issues.

• How long does family mediation take? The duration of family mediation varies based on the complexity of the issues involved, but most sessions last between 1-3 hours. Many families are able to reach an agreement after just a few sessions, depending on their willingness to cooperate and the nature of the issues at hand.

Can Parenting Time Agreements Be Changed Later?

Yes, parenting time agreements can be modified, especially if there are significant changes in circumstances, such as a parent’s relocation, a child’s changing needs, or other unforeseen events. Family mediation can be an excellent tool for making these adjustments in a cooperative and amicable way.

Conclusion: Building a Parenting Plan That Works for Your Family

Choosing the right parenting time schedule is an essential part of ensuring your child’s well-being during and after a divorce. Whether you opt for shared time arrangement, or something more customized, the most important factor is ensuring that the child’s best interests are always the priority.

Family mediation is an invaluable tool that can help parents work through these decisions. It allows parents, who know their children best, to work together in a peaceful, practical and cooperative setting. Rather than having a stranger, such as a judge, impose a schedule on the family, mediation empowers parents to take an active role in the development of a parenting plan that works for everyone.

If you're unsure about the best parenting time schedule for your family, consider working with a professional mediator. The mediation process offers the information, support, and guidance needed to reach an agreement that truly reflects the best interests of your child.

Need help working through your divorce through mediation or coaching? Schedule a free consultation by visiting www.zaykamel.com.

About the Author:

Zaynab Kamel is an Accredited Family Mediator (OAFM), Certified Divorce Coach, and Certified High Conflict Divorce Coach. With a background in social work, she brings a deep understanding of family dynamics and conflict resolution. When she’s not helping families through transitions, Zaynab enjoys hiking, yoga, and exploring the connections between astrology and human behavior.